Chupacabra Canoe

In the Morning! Commodore JStroke here to talk about camping tech.

Times are rare that create doubt or shake the foundation of my thoughts or opinions; I have many complex and layered personal beliefs.  In most cases, I am fully entrenched in my opinions and rarely find even the slightest whiff of a reason to consider a revaluation. Upon this rock, I have built the foundation of an intoxicating masculinity (just ask my wife). Don’t mistake my intoxicating masculinity for excessive pride; I can admit that in some moments, I have uttered the words “I’ve changed my mind”. Rare as those moments may be, like Halley’s comet, or the refs not clearly calling the game for the Chiefs, or The View actually having one that isn’t ridiculous, occasions do come around that create a tremor in that foundation. 

Such is the case with my much heralded tutorial series “Taking a Crap in the Woods”. While still one of the most entertaining blogs ever posted to this site, its subject matter has been rendered obsolete by the latest in portable outdoor toilet solutions:  the Crap Strap, AKA Krapp Strapp, AKA the Poop Hoop, AKA the Number Two Cummerbund, AKA Sh&* Sash (I could go on). Take a gander here: Crap Strap.

Although I am sad to be pushed to the lower bowl of camping technology, I have to admit, the Crap Strap revolutionized wilderness defecation.  I reckon you don’t need two minutes to read the instructions, grab your roll and a significant tree to experience the latest in technology in this area. Its so exciting! I think Beer Canoeist had one that was on our latest trip, the Au Sable in Michigan (Check out the trip review AuSable ). My finicky lower bowels and the availability of state provided outhouses didn’t allow me to experience the revolutionary technology in the wild this year. However, I did perform a closed environment experiment with a wall anchor and a five-gallon bucket in the garage (it was late, I was bored, and there was bourbon). 

If you are asking what makes an ingenious technological solution, my experience is that it should be practical, simple, and impactful (sounds like my nickname in high school). The Crap Strap delivers on all three and a rhyming name doesn’t hurt. 

In closing, I have to retire the “Crap in the Woods” series. Just get yourself a Crap Strap for your next foray in the wilderness and take that morning constitutional with pride, security, and confidence. 

Now who can give me a review of the  Go Girl?

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